October 8, 2024
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You make 10 passes and I give you £10,” Pascal Chimbonda shouts at the manager of Kendal Town, while witnessing them defeat his Skelmersdale United 3-1. The World Cup finalist was unhappy with the direct style of football on display in the Macron Cup, as he learned the realities of being a ninth-tier manager.

Quite what Chimbonda was expecting on a night of gales and rain in Burscough, where North West Counties League Premier Division Skelmersdale ground-share, is unknown. His opposite number, Jimmy Marshall, is a train driver who enjoyed a night of sweary badinage with the former Tottenham defender, while the assistant referee offered constant good humour despite every decision being questioned by Chimbonda, who made his presence known.

At one point Chimbonda came to the hoardings to discuss the match with Kendal’s chairman, Michael O’Neill, promising to buy him a steak dinner if Skelmersdale do not win the league fixture in late December. It gives Chimbonda, appointed by bottom-of-the-table Skelmersdale last Sunday, two months to make improvements or face coughing up for a sirloin. “If you’re winning 3-1 at any level, your players should be able to play 10 passes – it doesn’t matter what players you have,” Chimbonda said. “That is the way the league is and I know we are going to have to turn things around and make things better.”

Chimbonda’s side fell two goals behind in the opening eight minutes. They gradually improved, with all five substitutions made before the hour. A collection of would-be signings watched on, although not William Gallas or Emmerson Boyce, as fans joked who Chimbonda might bring with him.

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